Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Landing Butter Side Up

I have a good life, and I don't think I could have planned any of it to turn out this way. I was going to be a vet, or maybe a computer programmer, then maybe a researcher...I was NEVER going to be a teacher. Michigan? How did I get here? I don't really understand how any of this happened, this wonderful job, this fabulous family, these great friends.

I sometimes have students ask me for career advice, or tell me about their long term plans. I am terrible at advising them, because my comments go something like this..."There is absolutely no way for you to know what your life will be like in 10 years. You can plan and plan, you can apply to schools, you can try to find the perfect place to live...and I'll bet you ten bucks that your life will be so different than you expect, you won't even recognize it as your own." Uh, that's not what they want to hear. But it's the only experience I have to go by. Every once in a while, I think I actually help, by giving them permission to drop some of the stress...there is no such thing as a perfect decision.

Ending up a mommy is just another piece of my life that surprises me on a daily basis. This beautiful face looking up at me first thing in the morning...who could have known 10 years ago that E would be? That I would ask her every day what she dreamed about, and every day she would answer "Cho-lo-co-late." Who would have known that I would be waiting with M for a Christmas baby to arrive? That my nightly routine now involves at least one chuchi (pacifier) run and a baby kick to the bladder that sends me running?

When you're making your life altering decisions like which state to live in, which job to take, which person to date, which shoe to put on first...surrender a bit and realize that the best plans often land your toast butter side down. But here I am butter side up, complete with bad, good, and indifferent decisions, a million miles from where I planned to be.


Header Image from Bangbouh @ Flickr