The Post Pregnancy "Diet"

The process of recovering from childbirth is such a strange process. Just hours after I left the recovery room, I was craving food...massive amounts of food. They would only let me have liquids for the first day, which didn't sit well, but by midnight I was allowed to have a tuna sandwich...and sherbert...and fruit. In the morning, they gave me french toast for breakfast, grilled cheese for lunch, and turkey for dinner. I ate just about everything they put in front of me for two-and-a-half days.

My official weight the day before m was born (at my OB appointment) was about 182 lbs...that is hard to admit, even though it's a pregnancy weight! Harder still, I'm about to divulge my weight upon my arrival home...178 lbs. How, you may ask, did I only lose 4 pounds when I gave birth to an 8 pound baby? Well, somehow the grilled cheese and french toast turned into some sort of liquid which pooled in my legs, feet, and belly. Honestly, I came home looking almost as pregnant as I did before I gave birth. I looked at myself in the mirror and tears welled up in my eyes. The nurses told me it would "go away", but that it was more difficult with the second child.

Well, here I am, a week after returning home, and my weight this morning? 166 lbs! Um, could you please tell me where TWELVE POUNDS went in seven days? Yes, I'm breast feeding, yes, I'm eating better, but twelve pounds? I can see my ankles today for the first time, I can zipper my winter jacket, and I'm not worried anymore about people asking me, "When are you due?"

So my question is, how do we bottle this? How do we sell this hormones-water-loss-crazy-metabolism combination to make us a million dollars? Of course, we'd have to remove the "giving birth" requirement, or it would be a hard to market, I suppose.